lifestyle

Learning to be myself

Hi everyone! So today’s post is a little impromptu because today is one of my planned days but I just didn’t know what I wanted to post as I have a few drafts but I already planned for one to go up Friday and the others just didn’t seem to feel right. I also wanted to write this because I’ve seen a couple of posts about pressures of blogging and feeling inadequate as a smaller blogger which got me thinking and made me want to write this post so apologies if it’s a bit rambly. 

I honestly do feel a bit inadequate as a blogger sometimes. And I don’t mean it in the sense of oh I feel inadequate and yet I have thousands of followers. I literally have hardly any followers and when I get a few new followers I seem to lose some too so my numbers haven’t gone up in months. I also have no blogger friends, I just cannot seem to connect with anyone or at least nobody seems to want to connect with me. I don’t understand how people become friends with so many bloggers because when I try it’s like I fall flat on my face in front of the popular kids at school. I’m not trying to say that people who have thousands of followers can’t feel inadequate because we all have our insecurities and honestly this post isn’t meant to be a negative one as such.

The point of this post is that I am trying to bear to my own drum when it comes to blogging. There is so much pressure within the blogging community and I feel like I get so swept up in it. One of the biggest pressures at the moment seems to be that photography needs to be flawless. I almost bought a camera I couldn’t really afford due to this because I really wanted to up my photography. However, upon realising I couldn’t afford the camera, I have finally realised photography isn’t the be all and end all for me. Don’t get me wrong, I would love for my photography to look as amazing and flawless as everyone else’s but honestly I’m starting to realise that I don’t need these things to make my blog what I want it to be. I do want to up my photography game but I’m going to do it my way so if that means taking pictures through my iPod then so be it. 

My point is that I have to remember the reason for starting this blog. Particularly THIS blog because as I have mentioned before I did have a blog before this one and the reason I revamped was because I fell out of love with my old blog and I don’t want that to happen with this blog. I want this blog to portray me. I do like to take inspiration from other bloggers but I also don’t want to worry about what other people think of my blog. If I like what I am writing I will put it out there no matter how crazy it may seem to everyone else. I have a new series coming up and I was slightly apprehensive about it because it’s out of the box and it’s not something anyone else has done but that’s what I’m about. I don’t want to doubt myself and my ideas because at the end of the day it’s my blog and I don’t want to worry about whether people like my content or not. I’m not going to stop working hard to get followers but I want those followers based on the content I love to write and them liking it is a bonus and I want to beat myself up less if I don’t get the views or followers. 

Sorry if I have been quite rambly, I just felt I needed to put this all out there. I really do appreciate the people who do follow me and read my blog, I think every blogger has those days where they feel inadequate and I think I’ve just been feeling this way recently. Do you feel this way as a blogger? Feel free to share your feelings in the comments.

Thanks for reading!

Abbie. X

3 thoughts on “Learning to be myself”

  1. I totally get what you mean about the whole photography thing. I also almost bought a camera despite the fact that I already own a digital camera that takes perfectly fine pictures (not as fancy as some other cameras, but it does the job). You and I are in the same boat, we both started new blogs because we weren’t feeling our old ones anymore and although it can be discouraging because your following isn’t sky high, just remember that it isn’t about those numbers, it’s about enjoying being creative and putting something out there for the rest of the world to enjoy too x
    https://ciaraslittleblog.wordpress.com

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  2. I can totally appreciate this. Blogging is definitely a marathon, not a sprint! It’s taken me nearly a year to get anyone even looking at my blog, and even still my numbers aren’t great. I think the best thing to do, or certainly what I’ve tried to do, is stop worrying so much about what is deemed ‘acceptable’ in blogging, or trying to follow too many rules. I suck at flat-lays, my flat isn’t white and marbled, I am far from fashionable and I might be the messiest person to ever exist. Just roll with it, be kind to yourself, BE YOURSELF, and eventually you’ll have the right people reading your posts ❤

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  3. Honestly, I’ve been in the same position you’ve been in and I’ve been doing blogging for quite a while. In the end, I kind of learned to separate myself from my expectations and learned to blog less for others and more for myself. I stopped posting selfies and most of my attempts at photography because I want more people to concentrate on my content than my photography. For me and even with my lack of “good” and “proper” photography, this has been the best my blog has been statistically.

    That said, blogging is a process and it takes some time—sometimes longer than we would like—to get to a position where we can be comfortable with ourselves and our way of blogging. I think you have a lovely blog. I actually read it quite a bit—I’m working on the comment thing being massively shy is my downfall—and I think that you have your own sense of voice that works for you and that’s good.

    I hope you learn to stop doubting yourself as a blogger because you deserve more than that doubt and I know it’s not easy to get past that doubt, but I hope you get there, lovely. And thank you for sharing such an honest post with us. ❤

    mchi | mchiouji — http://blog.mchiouji.me
    ・ω・

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